I read a short reflection on humility this past week that frankly astonished me; it was that good! It was written by Jennifer Hartline, an army wife and mother of three. The reflection is based on her struggles with humility in light of this quote from St. Therese of Lisieux, “The splendor of the rose and the whiteness of the lily does not take away from the perfume of the little violet or the delightful simplicity of the daisy… perfection consists in doing God’s will, in being what God wills us to be.”
What I loved about her reflection was its honesty, which itself is a sign of humility. It wasn’t pie in the sky. It was real. It made me think of the many ways in which I struggle with humility, too.
In both the Old Testament text and the Gospel narrative this weekend, humility appears as the virtue needed to please God and also as a way of life that Christ’s followers need to learn. When Jesus observes the “seat-jockeying” taking place during dinner at the Pharisee’s home, he uses it to teach a lesson about humility, and reminds his host and the invited guests that to “exalt oneself” – that is to have an inflated sense of ourselves and our self-importance – will ultimately result in the very opposite of what we seek. But to “humble ourselves,” – that is, to remember our true place before Almighty God and before others – results in true greatness. A humble heart never forgets who and what it truly is.
Perhaps this might help us better understand humility. Elie Wiesel, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author and Holocaust survivor, tells a story about the great Hasidic Rabbi, Eliazar, who was asked by a student what he feared most about the day of judgment. The Rabbi paused for a moment and then answered, “On that day, God will not ask me why I was not like Moses. God will ask why I was not like myself. It is that question I most fear.”
I like to think of humility not as thinking less of ourselves but as thinking about ourselves less; to be less concerned about ourselves and our own egos and more focused on others. Using St. Therese’s analogy, what’s happening with the “seat-jockeying” at the Pharisee’s dinner table is this: the daisy thinks it’s the lily, and the violet pretending to be the rose.
Humility before God is to will what God wills for us; to be as God wills us to be – not more than that, but not less than that either. We don’t have to be Moses. But we do have to be ourselves in Christ. Not every flower can be a rose, says St. Therese, nor should they be. Humility is completely ok with that.
Jennifer concludes her reflection by saying this, “A heart that is humble rests confidently in His mercy and love, and has no fear of being little or ignored, nor any need for adulation. It is a relief to know that I am not fooling God… I have no one to impress – I only have One to love.”
So, how do we cultivate humility? Let’s start with these simple things:
Let’s be content in what God wills us to be and doing what God wills us to do, remembering that God calls us to be ourselves, and not every flower has to be a rose…
Let’s remember it doesn’t matter where we sit at a banquet, be it high or low. The main thing is to get there. We have no one to impress, just One to love…
Let’s rest confidently in God’s mercy, no matter how sinful we may be…
And, most of all, let’s be kindred spirits and servants to those who most resemble heaven here below; the poor, the suffering, and the stranger, and those who need our love…